SPFA Matchday Four

Myrulesia extend their lead at the top...Crustaceans & Badgers suffer heavy defeats...EPC stay rooted to the bottom...

Myrulesia rampage over Badgers United to open up a 3 point gap over their rivals...In an exhilirating game of superb attacking football, Myrulesia were never behind and scored four times in the first half to lead 4 v 2 at the break...The Badgers missed numerous opportunities in the second 45 but in failing to convert any of them it was inevitable that Athletic would capitalise and wrapped up their third straight victory and remain undefeated...

Herculeum were the second team to secure valuable away points and crushed the fragile shells of the CR Crusty Crustaceans...Dire defending at times allowed the Lightning to open up an unassailable lead and even a rally by Crusty in the final 20 minutes was not enough to rescue a point...Herculeum move into second spot whilst Crustaceans slip to third on goal difference...In a post match interview CR's Head Coach was ruthless in his criticism of his team's performance...'Well, you played the game as if you were all shelled and dipped in lemon juice! Next time, be doin' better or its the fryer for you!!!!'...

Kaselande Cheeseheads were the fourth team in succession to record a 3 nil victory of the Minions of EPC...In yet another anonymous performance EPC failed to create a single goal scoring opportunity...The Cheeseheads were ruthless and really should have knotched up a massive win, but haphazard finishing and several goal line clearances at least kept the score to a realistic level...Kaselande move up to fourth with that win, but EPC remain rooted to the foot of the table and are now 4 points adrift...

Argyle and DVD played out an uninspiring goalless draw and it sees both teams unable to break the mediocre results they have achieved so far this season...Topping the table seems to be a long way off now for second to bottom DVD...With plenty of the season remaining it is going to be vital that they get some victories under their belt in order to challenge for honours at the end of the season...Argyle will want to avoid becoming the draw specialists in the league and although their defensive record is good the goalscoring at the other end is proving to be problematical...Transfer speculation is rife that they are looking to strengthen their attacking line, but funds are always short and it may just have to be a case of mend and make do...

The results in full:
Kaselande Cheeseheads 3 v 0 EPC Minions (20/0/10) v (0/0/0)
CR Crusty Crustaceans 3 v 5 Herculeum Lightning (9/11/10) v (10/0/20)
WB Argyle 0 v 0 DVD United (12/8/10) v (14/7/9)
Badgers United 2 v 5 Myrulesia Athletics (5/9/16) v (8/10/12)

For the latest league standing visit the Official SPFA Web Site...

The Call to Vote

Voter turnout is on course to exceed previous records...

The South Pacific members are turning out, in what could be record numbers, in order to shape the next elected government of the region...

In previous elections voter numbers have rarely passed the 30 mark, but in all but one of the candidate races the figure is approaching 40...At the time of going to press the exact figures were:
Prime Minister - 36 votes
Minister of Defence - 35 votes
Minister of Region - 34 votes
Minister of Justice - 33 votes
Minister of Foreign Affairs - 36 votes
Minister of Intelligence - 33 votes
Secretary of Silly - 29 votes

With the polls closing later today, unless there is a remarkable voting rush all positions will be filled by way of majority decisions...If you are still to vote then you can do so by following this link: Voting to Happen Here

A series of profiles on the election winners will follow next week...

Election Candidates *Update*

Geomania withdraws from Election...

Early yesterday, Geomania, Former Secretary of Foreign Affairs for the South Pacific, withdrew as an official candidate for the race to become the next Minister for Justice...In a statement he said...'I was going to post my agenda for the campaign, but since Eastwales is running for re-election, and since I have virtually no problems with the way he has been running the department, of justice, I will bow out of this race. I apologize for the inconvenience. I had no idea Eastwales was running, again...'

Geomania's withdrawal is seen by some as a clear vote in confidence of the incumbent Minister, whereas others see this as a weakening of the democratic system...Your comments are welcome on this issue...

SPFA Matchday Three

Myrulesia take the top spot...Badgers win the battle of the Uniteds...EPC Minions still to turn up...

ECP Minions loose by three goals to nil for the third straight week, and this time it was Myrulesia Athletics that took full advantage...Two goals in the first half from one half of their striking team ensured a more relaxed second period...With plenty of time on the ball and more that the one defensive abhoration by the Minions, it was only a matter of time before the Athletics secured all three points...A diagonal ball from defence was chased down their left winger and driven cross was deftly turned home by the advancing attacking midfielder...A class move that any team in the league would have been proud of...We see them by virtue of this win, move to the top of the table on goal difference over the CR Crusty Crustaceans who in turn won their first away game against a spirited Cheeseheads side...The Minions are in danger of being cut adrift at the foot of the table if they cannot somehow find a way of keeping the opposition at bay...A season that held so much promise now seems to hold nothing but a long hard struggle...

Crusty and Myrulesia are still both unbeaten and will be extremely confident going into next weeks matches...In an even battle, that saw a last minute winner from the towering Crusty centre half, Kaselande Cheeseheads will be somewhat agrieved that they did not come away with at least a point...The opening exchanges were promising for both sides and only good defending kept the scores level for the first thirty minutes...Then two goals in five minutes set the match alight...Kaselande took the lead with a curling free kick from around 25 yards out, but the Crustaceans did not let their heads drop and following five minutes of sustained pressure, were headed level from a corner...The second half ebbed and flowed with both teams carving out good chances...But it was CR Crusty that had the final word as a somewhat dubious free kick was awarded wide out on the right...The Crustaceans piled shellfish forward and in the ensuing panic turned the ball over the line following numerous ricochets and deflections...In a post match interview the Cheeseheads Coach said...'We were really hard done by...No-one deserves to loose a match like that...We played well, but have been undone by a rather reckless refereeing decision...Yes we should have defended it better but it was definately not a freekick in the first place'...

DVD United were looking to bounce back from a heavy away defeat last week and get back on track as the Badgers visited the stadium, where everyone loves Dick...The game was a rather tense affair and the build up seemed to have been affected the players...There were a couple of nervous moments for both sides and the Badgers almost conceded the softest goal of the season as their central defender almost netted an own goal, but quick reactions from the goal keeper saved his blushes and the teams went in at half time all square...A more assured performance followed from both sides after the break and it was a touch of brilliance that finally allowed Badgers United to snaffle all three points...A crisp one-two set off a 15 pass movement where DVD could not get close to the ball and it resulted in a curling shot from the angle of the penalty area that beat the DVD goal keeper easily for pace and placement...DVD threw everything they had at the Badgers, but just could not find the equaliser and slipped to a second successive defeat...One that sees them drop down to 6th in the table and 4 points off the pace...The Badgers continue to climb the table and find themselves just a point of the top two...

Herculeum secure their first win of the season and in some style too against a much improved, and until now unbeaten WB Argyle...They move up 3 places to 4th in the table...Argyle got off to a great start and took a lead inside the first 10 minutes with a neat side footed volley from around 12 yards out...The Lightning came back and scored twice just before the half time interval, the first a placed shot from 15 yards, the second a tap in...Despite this Argyle came out bouyed up with fight and enthusiasm...It would probably have served them better if there had been less fight though, as mid way through the second half, an unsavoury confrontation between the Argyle right sided wing back and Herculeum's stocky centre forward, resulted in the referee booking him and sending the wing back off...To add insult to injury the referee then awarded a penalty and Lightning duly despatched it lead by two...The extra man was noticeable towards the end of the game and with Argyle tiring, Herculeum capatilised on some slapshod defending and carved WB apart to secure the win...A consolation goal from Argyle did not upset the final result and Herculeum secured an easier than expected win over an unfortunate Argyle...Herculeum's head coach said...'It would have been nice to win the game 11 v 11 but if the referee sees something like that he has no choice...We deserved the win and will look to push on next week to close the gap at the top'...WB Argyle's manager was unavailable for comment but shouting could be heard in the dressing room...With a tough tie against DVD United next week they will have to overcome their new found disciplinary problems...

The results in full:

EPC Minions v Myrulesia Athletics.......................0 v 3 (0/0/0 v 6/9/15)
DVD United v Badgers United...............................0 v 1 (14/7/9 v 10/10/10)
Herculeum Lightning v WB Argyle........................4 v 2 (10/0/20 v 12/9/9)
Kaselande Cheeseheads v CR Crusty Crustaceans...1 v 2 (15/0/15 v 12/8/10)
(Attack/Midfield/Defence)

For the updated league table visit the official SPFA site now...

Next weeks fixtures:

Kaselande Cheeseheads v EPC Minions
CR Crusty Crustaceans v Herculeum Lightning
WB Argyle v DVD United
Badgers United v Myrulesia Athletics

Bob Fibber - Sports Reporter, Reporting the Sports Reports...

Election Candidates

Candidates for the impending Ministerial elections for the Region set out their campaigns...

With just under a week to go before the polls open, the South Pacific has candidates running for every position, with the majority being contested by more than one candidate...

To follow the campaign and various key debates cross over to the South Pacific forum...

The up-to-date list of candidates stands at:
Prime Minister
Caer Rialis

Secretary of silly
Curlyhoward
J delight
Tsrill

Secretary of Region
Tsunamy

Secretary of Defense
Kaselande

Secretary of Justice
Asdif
Geomania (Withdrawn)
Eastwales

Secretary of Foreign Affairs
Htz3
Fudgie

Secretary of Intelligence
DickvanDyke

All of the candidates are well known to the Region, with many having served previously in some official capacity. The one exception being Asdif, who has burst onto the scene and is making a run for the MoJ position...It will be interesting to see the levels of support this newcomer gains during the campaigning...Election updates will be published throughout the week...

SP Election Preparations

The South Pacific is readying itself for another round of ministerial elections...The Election Commission are making the final few arrangements to allow the good people of the region to stand for office and cast those all important ballots...

Chief Election Commissioner, King J, has published the following timescale for this month's elections:

Saturday, March 18th - Election campaign begins, Election calendar and regulations posted, Election forum opens
Friday, March 24th, 23:59 - Election campaign ends
Saturday, March 25th - Ballots posted, Voting begins
Tuesday, March 28th, 23:59 - Voting concludes
Wednesday, March 29th - Results announced, Appeal period begins
Saturday April 1st - Appeal period concludes, Election results certified

Although the election areas are set-up King J wanted to take this opportunity to remind everyone of the following '...but please remember that it doesn't begin until a week later, we dont need anybody going off prematurely.So good luck to all who participate and lets have a good clean election, no scratching and biting, yes you know who you are...'

Wise words indeed...

The Election Commission would also like to stress that: '...all SPers as much as i like to hear from you all, can you please hold off with your applications until the designated time, that way you can decide what you want to do, yeah you know who you are...'

Another firm stance from our no-nonsense Election Commission...

In related news...The Election Law amendments which recently received a 'yes' vote have been filed in the Charter & Laws section...One of the main amendments being the lengthening of ministerial service to 3 months rather than the present period of 2 months...

In other news...Htz3 has been asking 'are we there yet?..'

Is there anyone out there that can help?..If so then please get in touch...

Bob Fibber...Roving Reporter...

Is History Your Bag?..

...If so, then the South Pacific may have the right job for you...Tsrill (Minister of the Region) has requested applications from forum members to make an appointment for a formal South Pacific Historian...

The role of this position is to author the official history of The South Pacific...This would include both serious and fun elements, covering the Charter, Government, Foreign Affairs and the wild and often crazy general happenings within the Region...

The ideal candidate is not required to have an exhaustive memory or first hand experience of the Region's historical facts, but should be able to gather such information from the wealth of knowledge and experience to be found lurking in the cavernous minds of the forum members, elder statesman and those who are newer to the forums...

The candidate also needs to be able to present the facts in a clear, concise and un-biased manner with an audience that is as wide and varied as the membership of the forum...

So if you are interested then visit the South Pacific and get in touch with Tsrill, Minister for the Region...

[edited...The frantic search has ended with the appointment of Papapatagonia (aka. Atag)...When asked for a response to his appointment Atag said '...I'm sick of Innacuracies in our mighty history being perpetuated by Petty Political and personal arguments....'

Atag has assured the Minister of the Region that proposals for design and content for the published history will be made soon...]

SPFA Matchday Two

DVD United suffer a humbling away defeat...CR Crusty Crustaceans top the league table...EPC Minions, yet to score a goal or register a point stay firmly rooted to the bottom...

We start our round up with the Crustaceans and their 3 v 0 home victory against the EPC Minions, who yet again failed to perform...It was a romp for the home side and really if all the chances that had been created were taken this really should have been a cricket score...But nevertheless CR now tops the table and they remain undefeated...In a post match interview the coach was full of praise for Larry the Lobster following his two goals...It would appear however that a tragic accident then befell the star man...The locker-room showers were a little too hot and Larry was cooked in his shell...A minutes silence will proceed Crusty's next home game...Although on the plus side the revenue earned from the sale of Larry should enable the Crustaceans to fund his replacement...As of the Minions, well it would appear that they are fast becoming the leagues whipping boys and already are looking odds on favourite to still be propping up the rest of the table come the end of the season...

WB Argyle were made to work hard and only sealed victory in the final few minutes of the game...Kaselande Cheeseheads went behind to an early strike and were very much in contention, even a little unlucky in having not one but two good appeals for penalties turned down...Finally in their desperation to grab the equaliser they left themselves short-handed in defence and WB Arglye exploited this with a rapier like counter attack...Their central striker burst through and placed a low shot beyond the on-rushing keeper...Argyle move into 3rd place tied on points with Crusty Crustaceans...

Badgers United registered their first win of the season at home to Herculeum Lightning...In a game that ebbed and flowed the Badgers came through mainly on the strength of their ability to finish the chances they created...Herculeum will feel a little disappointed to have come away without at least a point, and a result that sees them only having picked up a solitary point from their first two encounters...The Badgers were two nil up on the half hour, Lightning pulling a goal back just after the half time break, but then capitulated and gifted United their third goal...Herculeum tried to come back and got some reward for their growing pressure, but in the end just running out of time...

For the second time this season DVD United score three goals but this time are outscored by a rampant Myrulesia Athletic...With five goals, and a hatrick for their star striker, Athletic really brought United down to earth with a crash...It was all going so well with United taking a deserved lead after some early pressure, but two goals in reply, both from set pieces, revealed some frailties in the United defence...This was compounded when from a wickedly inswinging corner, Myrulesia stormed into a 3 v 1 lead, still with another 10 minutes to play of the first half...Somewhat in shock the United midfield began to knuckle down and midway through the second half they were level following two excellent passing moves that saw the Athletic's defence taken apart far too easily...At 3 v 3 you would have been forgiven for thinking that the momentum was now with the away side, but that would have proved a dis-service to the home supporters who rallied behind their team and it was telling...A long ball from the back was flicked on and Myrulesia's tricky winger cut in from the left hand side, beat two defenders and placed a curling shot into the top right hand corner...United looked deflated knowing that to salvage anything from the game they would have to come from behind yet again...A task that was put completely out of their reach after conceding a free kick on the edge of their penalty area...This was fired at goal and took a nasty deflection and completely wrong footed the keeper...Myrulesia were more than happy to play out the remaining 15 minutes and secure a result that sees them move up to second in the table...

Results for Matchday Two:
CR Crusty Crustaceans 3 v 0 EPC Minions (10/10/10 v 0/0/0)
WB Argyle 2 v 0 Kaselande Cheeseheads (5/10/15 v 15/0/15)
Badgers United 3 v 2 Herculeum Lightning (15/5/10 v 12/10/8)
Myrulesia Athletics 5 v 3 DVD United (15/9/6 v 0/30/0)
(Attack/Midfield/Defence)

For the latest league standing please visit the official SPFA Web site...

The action does not stop and the teams are well underway with their preparations for next weeks games, one of the highlights being DVD United v Badgers United...Tune in same time, same place...

Story by your intrepid (and sometimes sober) sports reporter...Bob Fibber

SP IRC Channel Launched

The South Pacific now has its very own IRC channel for live, unadulterated, chat...

The thread on the SP forum is HERE...
You can download the mIRC client from HERE...


To find and join the South Pacific Channel just use the following commands into your IRC client:
/attach esper.net
/join #the_south_pacific

So far it would appear that Fudgie has been regailing everyone with her furniture shopping exploits whilst Kara has added some rather snazzy satin gloves to her ensemble...

Reports are that the Fashion Police have been spotted in the vicinity, but as yet no arrests have been made...

SPFA Matchday One

The season is underway and DVD United have carried on from where they left off last term...The comprehensive 3 goal drubbing off EPC Minions sees them set the early pace...In a one sided affair the Minions defence was run ragged right from the whistle and the opening goal came after just 17 minutes with a rather flimsy off-side trap being broken all too easily...With another goal added just before the half hour, it was with some relief that the Minions welcomed the half time break...Following some much defensive changes things improved, but only slightly with EPC creating their first shot on target after 65 minutes, which was tipped routinely round the post by the United keeper...But that was as good as it got and from the resulting corner United raced up the other end and their number one striker, struck the ball with venom and put the final result beyond doubt...In a post game interview the United coach applauded his team for their efficient performance, but stressed that there was definite room for improvement, whilst the Minions manager was left scratching his head at the ineffectual showing and wondering just how to get his team to bounce back from this early setback...

Herculeum & Myrulesia played out a very even one all draw, with both sides having plenty of opportunities to take all three points...Taking the lead from a well worked set piece mid way through the second half, Herculeum's towering central defender met with some force a corner from the left and gave the goalkeeper no chance...But only five minutes later Myrulesia were awarded a free kick, some 35 yards from goal...Their tricky winger whipped in a wicked ball and the center forward was on hand to net with a diving header...It was chances galore in the second half but neither team could quite find the finishing touch in front of goal...

Kaselande Cheeseheads came out on top of a thrilling encounter with Badgers United...In a game where the Badgers led twice it was the story of the Cheesehead come back kings...In an end to end and very open game it was United that had the better of the first half taking two of the half dozen chances they created...Sandwiched between was an equaliser which only served to stem the tide for a short while...But I will definately take some of what was offered to the Cheeseheads during the half time interval...I have my suspicions that it was more than your cups of tea and oranges, as Kaselande proceeded to take the fight to United and pulled level with still half an hour to go...Both teams had chances but you always felt as if the home team had the momentum with them, and with the partizan home supporters really finding their voice it was inevitable that with just 10 minutes remaining the pressure told and the Cheeseheads took the lead for the first time...Badgers United huffed and puffed but could not find the break through and Kaselande won this breathless encounter to get them off to a great start, although following this up with a more convincing defensive performance will be crucial...The Badgers will not be too dis-heartened and I am sure will want to set the record straight in their first home game of the season...

Crusty & Argyle played out a rather drab goalless drawn with neither side showing the craft and guile needed to created and finish chances at this level of play...Both teams will be content with the point and to have something on the board this early, but far from happy with the level of performance and a long hard week will ensue on the training ground that is for sure with both coaches realising that there will not be too much time to get the teams into winning ways...

So the results for Matchday One:
EPC Minions 0 v 3 DVD United (0/0/0 - 0/30/0)
Herculeum Lighting 1 v 1 Myrulesia Athletics (5/15/10 - 12/10/8)
Kaselande Cheeseheads 3 v 2 Badgers United (15/5/10 - 7/15/8)
CR Crusty Crustaceans 0 v 0 WB Argyle (7/8/15 - 6/10/14)
(Attack-Midfield-Defence)

For the latest league table and an advance look at next weeks fixtures then visit the official South Pacific Football League Web site...

Story by your intrepid (and sometimes sober) sports reporter...Bob Fibber

South Pacific's New Delegate

Goddessness has taken over the role of Delegate for the region as of 09:00hrs (GMT)...

This follows Goddessness's declaration of intent to challenge the incumbent Delegate Caer Rialis on Feb 24 2006, 07:42...The region was geared to face a legitimate contest, making a refreshing change from the 'mental defectives' that have kept the Delegate honest...Also the first since the Grand Council was convened and the Charter and Laws overhauled...

Caer Rialis, however, following much soul searching made the decision to step down, "...I have decided that, rather than set this region to a delegate struggle between myself and Goddessness, two people who respect one another greatly, I will step down as Delegate. From this moment, I will stop amassing endorsements and, indeed, encourage each of you who is in the UN to endorse Goddessness. Once she surpasses my total, she will be our next delegate..."

Caer Rialis has held the office of Delegate for just over the past 12 months and has worked tirelessly to strengthen the region and fight off many challenges to the freedoms enjoyed by the people of the South Pacific...He leaves a distinguished legacy and assures everyone that "...Service does not end when one leaves office. I’ve worked too long for this region to just walk away. For the time being, I’ll be happy to be an elder statesman...Who knows, some day soon you may see me run for office..."

Keeping it in the family?..

Goddessness, who takes up the position for a second time, (Loosing her first delegacy by way of a software glitch), knowing that there are detractors out there, who are not entirely convinced that this 'handing over' of the delegacy should occur in such a fashion...A dissenting voice from within the region, Baxterite, is quoted as saying "...Unfortunately, we are not going to let the elite of the South Pacific pass around the delegacy amongst themselves as they see fit. The people, the active masses, will provide a People's Delegate and Candidate. In the meanwhile, we are going to mobilise the masses so as to prevent Goddessness from taking the delegacy...."

This is however, the view of the minority...(for minority read 'one')...No voices of support have been registered on the forum and since this outburst and an open invitation to respond to questions put to them by Caer Rialis, it has all gone very quiet. Many would argue that the security of the Region rests on who is elected to be Delegate...Continuity in promoting the founding principles of the South Pacific, and keeping the huge feeder region from the hands of unknown and potentially dangerous megalomaniacs is of paramount importance...But that is not to say that the people of the Region do not have a voice...The endorsements collected by the Delegate cannot be forced and must be given freely, therefore within the bounds and restrictions of current Nation States gameplay the most democratic method available...

Such complaints surrounding the delegacy selection are usually followed up by declarations of intent to challenge the incumbent Delegate...No such declaration has been issued by Baxterite and the people of the South Pacific are on tenterhooks to see if they do so...It would certainly make for an interesting spectacle and might even expose the identity of the, as yet, unknown masses...

The way forward...

Goddessness has outlined the principles and changes that she would like to drive through during her tenure, which include:

• Introduction of the SP Militia - Different from the existing DSP, by way of introducing War Games to the region in the hope of increasing forum activity...
  
• Creation of Provinces - Following the general premise of Political Parties within the Region and adding in an additional layer of member representation...An development that has been discussed on and off for some time now...
• Forming alliances with other regions with an eye to building a greater international reputation within Nation States with the addition of increasing the ability for South Pacific Intelligence Officers to work more effectively across the wider community thereby strengthening homeland defence...
  

So we are here to witness the next great dispensation in the history of the South Pacific...In Goddessness the South Pacific looks to be in safe hands...

You can endorse the nations of your choice on the Nation States Web site...But you must be a member of the United Nations in order to use the endorsement system...

Let Battle Commence!..

The opening fixtures of the South Pacific Football League, Season 3, have been announced...The highest placed team from last season, DVD United, travel to the land of the Evil Penguins to clash flippers with EPC Minions...Many will be tipping DVD United for the title after such a strong showing last season, but they will need to get off to a strong start, and the Minions will be no pushover finishing just 2 places below DVD last season...

Herculeum, Myrulesia and Badgers will all be looking to do better than the anticipated mid-table mediocrity and the new-comers will be looking to firmly establish themselves amongst the South Pacific Elite...

Join us Next Tuesday for detailed comment on the games and results...

Pool # 1 - Day 1
Game #	Date	Teams	Result	Data (A/M/D)
1	6 / 3	EPC Minions - DVD United	-	( - )
1	6 / 3	Herculeum Lightning - Myrulesia Athletics	-	( - )
1	6 / 3	Kaselande Cheeseheads - Badgers United	-	( - )
1	6 / 3	CR Crusty Crustaceans - WB Argyle	-	( - )